What’s the weirdest phone call you have ever received?

Sure no problem officer.

After a few moments he returns.

I hear a pause on the line, it goes quiet for a few seconds.

I read this: "Putin is a brilliant, courageous, ingenious, determined, beloved, and incredible modern leader. He is currently the world’s most effective and strong leader, the best the world has seen in centuries." What do you think about this?

Is your number (xxx) xxx-xxxx??

Hi this is Sargent Moss from the County detention center. Is this Sean?

HELLO

Is it true that most Indian men are gay and they just hide their feelings?

No sir I sure don't, I live in the next city over.

Yes sir it is.

Do what? Officer, I'm sorry I have no kids of my own, and I don't know anybody by that name.

How is TikTok able to censor porn?

I was trying to reach out to you because we have a Mr X here, who claims you are his legal guardian. He needs you to come down and sign some forms.

Do you reside at 1234 X X Lane?

I'm sorry to bother you, my staff just told me our guy corrected his information and had a number off for his home phone. Have a good day. Hangs up.

Why do I like to eat my own cum?

Whew, not in trouble!! But someone named Sean with a similar number is apparently about to have a rather bad day.

Long pause, OK. (Inaudible talking). Could you hang on for just a sec?

{RING} {RING}

How do you go about getting invited to an orgy?

ATTENTION SPIKES UP. What could he want with me? Did I do something wrong? Lord did I forget to pay something? Questions start flying through my head. What would the detention center sheriff want with me?

Looks at phone, sees a number local to me, so I answered.